Try and fail, but don't fail to try.

Yesterday the salon was so quiet it wasn't even funny. My client didn't show up, the whole day was just spent mucking around. One thing achieved is I've passed my manicure and pedicure final questions (like an oral test). So now I am officially a semi-qualified manicurist and pedicurist!

Today I tried to get a final for a body massage - not oral test, we need to first pass the practical part (performing the treatment) before we get to the oral test. When I was done, the teacher was away for lunch. When I came back, I was filling out stuff in my book and the teacher came in and asked if I've had lunch, to which I replied yes, and she asked if I could do a pedicure, to which of course I had to say yes? I mean if you're working in a real salon how can you say no, right? That's like saying "no" to a job wtf. Anyway, I quickly went and set up and when I was about to get started, the teacher told me "Just wanted to get the pedicure out of the way. Once you're done with it, I'll give you feedback on your body massage."

Usually the teacher would let me know if I've passed or not right away. Well, usually if I've passed, they'll let me know straight. If I didn't, usually they'll give me 'feedback' to why I didn't. So I was feeling quite deflated when I was doing the pedicure thinking I've failed but well, life goes on. I can always try again, I know.

After the treatment I sat down with the teacher to get my 'feedback'. The first thing she asked me was, "So Ee Von, how did you think you went with the treatment?". And I honestly replied saying I thought it went quite well, everything was good. And she gave me her feedback and I gave her my opinion and yadda yadda yadda. In the end, she told me "Yup, I thought you did well too. So go home and study, we'll do your (final) questions tomorrow."

In short, I passed.

Words cannot express my relief. Seriously. Suddenly I find myself relating well to a saying that goes in The Hunger Games. Can't remember the exact words but it goes something like having a little hope is good, having too much hope is bad. Something along that line. 

Hope drives you forward. Too much hope can mean so much disappointment. But above it all, try and fail, but don't fail to try. 

I now sincerely regret not going to school enough at the very beginning, I could have progressed even more at this stage. I could have crossed out a few things I had to do, and made time for other things now. But what's done is done, as long as right now I am at the right pace catching up. Every day I'm at school, I learn something new. Even if there's no clients, I miss nothing. But every day I'm not at school, I'm at risk of missing something - a chance to gain competencies, a chance to gain finals, a chance to learn something new. 

Hopefully I'll be done by this June before the besties come over to Melbourne for a short getaway. Just a tiny hope, to which I shall work hard on.

The Cold Weekend

It's been getting quite cold lately but I'm definitely not complaining, I'd rather it cold than stuffy and warm because I don't remember having such good sleep in the past 2 days for quite some time ever since the weather went warmer early this year.  It's frustrating when all I do at night is waking up in the middle of a sleep, having difficulties to fall back into sleep, tossing and turning because every posture just felt uncomfortable. AAaaaand, the mother of all problems... ants. Since it's not a problem anymore, I won't get into that. Let's just hope I won't have to go into that.

I've never had Sichuan food until last year here in Melbourne and I must say... gosh how much I've missed out! Sichuan food is awesome. This is leftover pork ribs smothered with chili flakes and Sichuan pepper that we didn't finish when we had it in a restaurant. It's not spicy at all... well depending on your spice/heat tolerance. Sichuan pepper gives a numbing sensation when you bite it, it's not spicy or heaty like chili. Which I really like because I find the sensation really interesting! Haha.

For dinner on Saturday we decided to try Chilipadi Mamak Kopitiam. It was ok, nothing to shout about. There're definitely better tasting Malaysian food out there. Went home and it was already quite late but I decided to bake... because I can.

It's Red Velvet (Mini) Cupcakes with Cream Cheese Frosting, recipe from here. Mini because I don't have regular cupcake/muffin tins at the moment. I had a little bit of a disaster moment while making it. I added a little more buttermilk than I should have out of carelessness so to make it up to the extra liquid, I added a little more dry ingredients without measuring (blind estimation), I wasn't bothered to throw out the batter and start again. The cake turned out fine! Except that I didn't think the cake would rise since it didn't ask for any raising agent (baking powder, self-raising flour) and I didn't think baking soda/bicarbonate soda is a raising agent, I filled the first batch of cupcakes quite full. Result: muffin top aka the cake 'overflowed'. But apart from presentation, the cake tasted good. Soft, fluffy and moist.

2nd disaster moment is the frosting. I think I shouldn't have used soft icing and should have used pure icing instead. My frosting look 'grainy' for unknown reasons... when it should be a smooth, beautiful opaque cream colour. I'm guessing it's the starches in the soft icing that's causing this ugly outcome. Bleghhh. Also, I would have loved my cream cheese frosting to be more cream cheese and heavy, this one is a tad bit too light and buttery. But I do like the lovely roses I piped out! Can anyone tell it's a white rose... ? Wk couldn't :((

 HAHAHA

Love how my cheekbones make my face look so slim here! <3

Just because I haven't done this in a while :P

Went and watched Hunger Games earlier. Wasn't interested in it at the beginning because the trailer didn't look interesting but apparently it's gotten really good ratings in Rotten Tomatoes so we decided to give it a shot. Not bad... worth the time and money spent.

And that concludes the weekend. Back to school tomorrow and let's hope I'll be able to do much better this week.

Big expectations, bigger disappointments.

Once again, I was determined to go to school and get a few finals slashed out of my to-do list. Did great jobs on both my eyebrow wax and facial, but didn't get passed because of silly mistakes. So silly. I was so close to getting them. So near yet so far. It's not easy to get clients who are easy to deal with and who are assessable. A client may come in with an eyebrow wax but if her eyebrows have good shape, I can't be assessed.

I did a great job with the eyebrows, but I didn't pass because I didn't tidy up my work station after that. Well the only reason I did not, is because the client was having a massage right after that. I didn't know I am actually allowed to leave my client on the bed, to tidy my station. With the facials, I was extracting milia. Honestly, it was my first time doing it but I've seen it done and it's really easy. I asked the teacher for help because it didn't come out as easily as I've seen it performed. And because I got assistance, I didn't get the finals. If I knew I wouldn't pass because I've asked for assistance, I would NOT have asked for it. I seriously wouldn't.

I'm not blaming anyone. It's nobody's mistake but myself, I just have to learn from it and not repeat it the next time I attempt a final. I guess I was pushing myself too hard by having too much expectations. Expecting to get my finals, expecting to get more waxing clients to attempt competencies (didn't get ANY at all today), expecting to be doing well. The bigger the expectation, the bigger the disappointment. Cliched but true and it will hit you like a mother.

But you know what? I'm not going to stop expecting because it's what drives me forward. I will continue to expect the shit out of myself (not literally...) and I'm going to get it.

Punctured confidence

Things were looking kinda great this morning when I passed my manicure and pedicure finals, and I managed to get an underarm and half leg wax client in the afternoon. Then it was all disappointment when her underarm hair wasn't 'full' enough to be assessable. And for the half leg wax, dammit why can't I move quicker for the 19862312th time??? Including today it's been the 4th time I failed to get a competency in half leg waxing already. Not because I don't know how to do it, but I just can't get it done in that freaking impossible 20 minutes. Yeah sure 20 minutes no problem, but it sure will be a shitty result.

Far king hell I need to get my arse moving faster like a Wonder Woman.

Came home feeling exhausted and deflated. Decided to get high with some cider and forget the day. Oh yeah, I can get high with only 4% alcohol. Watched an episode of 2 Broke Girls online (new favourite sitcom) while sipping my awesome cider, face went red as tomato, head felt like it's rocking like a boat in the sea, watched My Kitchen Rules like a couch potato. 

Ok gtg prepare for tomorrow. Ciao.

Find a way, or make one.

School today was really motivating. I finally feel like I'm on the pump if compared to a month ago when I was literally dreading to go to school. Did a facial, a body massage, an eyelash tint, eyebrow tint, eyebrow wax and lip wax. Don't wanna sound like I'm bragging but my clients were happy, gave really positive feedback and I managed to get 1 competency and 2 finals done. The teacher spoke to me personally and told me I would make a really good therapist and that she can see that I have a passion in beauty.

Which sounded strange to me... because I didn't know it. That I have a passion in it?

All I wanted to do is make sure people leave the salon happy with what they paid for, exactly how I myself would like if it was me paying the money. Isn't that what trades and services industry is all about? Anyway, the teacher was really motivating and was the one who pushed me to do my finals when I told her I'm not ready, assuring me that I'm 'more than ready' to do it and I should get it out of the way as soon as I can so that I'll finish the course in time.

Now I'm on the roll. I feel really determined to finish in time. Actually, being a kiasu asian, I hope I can finish before the time. Not necessarily confident, but I know I can do it if I really push myself. All I need to do, is go to school and do what I do best; which is doing the best I can.

Who knows? This could be something that can pay my bills in the future.

Nothing that’s worthwhile is ever easy

~Nicholas Sparks

This is going to be a full-on post about how my day went from shitty to yippee. I'm sorry if some of you may not understand what I'm talking about because it's all about what happened at school but just deal with it and pretend you do kthxloveya.

So I went to school really really early today because I know the earlybirds usually get to 'pick' what type of clients they want (I need it to finish all my competencies in order to graduate, latecomers get leftovers). I was the first to arrive in salon and I didn't see a teacher there which is unusual because usually the teachers are really early. So I started to set up the salon myself and then more students started to turn up and there's still no teacher.

And then a teacher came and told us the teacher who's suppose to be there is running late, but she'll delegate our clients for us in a while. I was only away for a while to put the linens in the cupboard, and I see the teacher asking other students what they need, instead of me first. I know technically nothing wrong but I can't help it but to feel really frustrated because I did wake up at 7.30, and rushed my ass off to catch an early train just to arrive early at school only because I thought I can get what I want. Turns out that's not the case.

FINE.

Then I went and clock on my attendance card. 

Before I talk about that, let me just say that I forgot to do laundry and only washed my uniform yesterday so it's still wet. So I came to school and took the spare uniform I had which I've kept in my locker. I admit, it's extremely crumpled, and it looks unpresentable. But there's nothing I can do about it. At least I'm at school and I have a uniform?

So I was trying to clock on, and the woman who was supposed to give me my card, didn't allow me only because my uniform looked really unpresentable. Not only did she send me away, she sent me away without telling me what I can do about it. I was seriously speechless.

So I came to school so freaking early, didn't get what I wanted, and now I'm not allowed to clock on and I have to be considered absent in school, but fact is I still have to stay in school and work on clients without getting an attendance?

Then another teacher came up to me and asked me to be a model for her Hot Stone Therapy class. Since I didn't get to experience it the last time I did the course, I thought it'd be a good opportunity to. At least having this opportunity made me feel like it's not a waste of time coming to school.

And then my friend insisted that I take her uniform, wear it and go clock on, and then switch back. So I did. And when I went up to the woman, she asked "Did you get the uniform from another girl?" 

What the fuck did she expect me to say? "No I saw it hanging down the corridor so I took it" OF COURSE IT'S ANOTHER GIRL'S UNIFORM SINCE YOU DIDN'T GIVE ME A SOLUTION, WHERE ELSE CAN I GET IT FROM.

Anyway. I said yes and she said "Good". And I casually asked her if there's an iron in the school that I can use. And she said "Yes but you know what you can do? Put your uniform into the dryer, and see if that'll straighten out the creases. Otherwise, I'll get you the iron."

WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T SHE SUGGEST THAT AT THE BEGINNING? WHY MAKE ME GET ANOTHER UNIFORM JUST SO THAT I CAN CLOCK ON?

Seriously, at that point I was beyond words. Then I went for a 10 minutes break with my friends. When I got back, the teacher told me because I was gone and the teacher who needed me as a model for Hot Stone Therapy needed someone immediately, another person went for it already. In other words, I couldn't be the model anymore.

Can the day just get anymore worse?

Then I was asked to be a model for a lash tint, brow tint and a brow wax which I did went for. I needed to unwind seriously. I was on the verge of erupting like Mount Fuji. The girl who practiced on me did a great job and she was really nice. It was overall enjoyable, thank goodness. 

I went back to salon to be told that my client who was supposed to come at 12.30, came way earlier so someone else did her facial already. But in return, I got a client at 2pm which is an eye brow wax and a facial. Not exactly what I needed but better than nothing.

After lunch, went back to salon and waited for her. Client arrived and turns out she booked in for an eyebrow wax AND an eyebrow tint. Wasted time just to clarify that, great. Eyebrow tint went ok. Eyebrow wax took me 30 minutes, which is double the supposed time. Well to justify that, I wanted to do a great job. 

Honestly, I'd rather take a longer time and do a great job that leaves a good impression in the client, than spend the allocated time and do a shitty or average job that the client won't even notice a thing. My client was really happy with what I did, so was I.

Anyway, I proceeded to facials. Usually after the skin analysis, students are supposed to call the teacher to have a check at the analysis before deciding what products to use. It was already 3.40, less than an hour to the closing of the salon. I went out to get the teacher and not only did she not want to check my analysis but move straight to giving me products (I have to decide the products myself), she said "Ee Von what's wrong with you today you took so long for eyebrow wax" or something along that line, trying to say I'm being too slow and I need to move quickly.

Honestly, I was frustrated already. And she didn't help at all. It only made me more frustrated than I already was. I know she didn't mean it negatively, I admit I was being slow, but I'm just doing my best. I don't care if I finish late and leave after the school/salon hours as long as the client leaves happily. If I was a client, that's the kind of treatment I'll be looking for too.

At the end of the facial treatment, not only did I manage to sell a product to the client, I think, I'm not entirely sure but I think, the client rebooked me for her next eyebrow tint, eyebrow wax and an advanced facial treatment, which was something I recommended her to do apart from the regular facial she had with me. She was asking me if she could have a feedback sheet so that she can write her review, which we don't normally do. Usually the teacher would speak with the clients personally, but because the school/salon was closing, I didn't bother, I didn't think my teacher would bother either. In the end, she prompted and spoke to my teacher and gave a really good feedback.

Now that... deserves a good pat on the back and made all the shitty incidents I had to go through worthwhile.

Chocolate Peanut Butter Torte

Yesterday we went over to Maggie's place to bake and boy was it a fruitful baking day! Our Chocolate Peanut Butter Torte was a success! Look how beautiful that sinful thing is in the picture! We used this recipe and I highly recommend it. If anyone's going to use the recipe, here are a couple of things that we've tweaked:

- For the remaining 1 cup of confectioner's sugar to be added into the peanut butter mixture, we reduced it to 1/2 cup because we like it not so sweet. We've tested recipes from this blogger and they do tend to turn out to be too sweet sometimes for our likings.
- We didn't have espresso/coffee powder so we didn't add any. Still tasted good.
- It called for Oreo cookies but we weren't sure if it was with the Oreo filling or not, and we weren't sure if it was 24 pairs of Oreo or 24 single Oreo cookies. We omitted the filling anyway and used 48 single Oreo cookies because when we started off with 24 single cookies, it felt insufficient to fill the base.

This recipe is super easy, but super sinful. It's basically cream cheese, heavy cream, peanut butter, peanuts, chocolate ganache, oreo cookies, chocolate chips and sugar. No flour, no baking agent. All you need to do is chill it for at least 4 hours. But it tastes SO GOOD. If you love peanut butter, you will DIE for this. Hahahah, ok maybe not. But it's seriously really addictive.

Here's a video showing a bunch of suaku getting super excited to unmould the torte and feeling proud of our achievement!

Made siu yok today but that shall go to another post =) Time to sleep now!