A cookie within a cookie

Happy belated Mid-Autumn Festival everyone! I wanted to grab a traditional mooncake just to feel close to home but unfortunately, the mooncakes here cost a bomb and I've asked a couple of people and everyone said they're not good. So we decided to try these dessert-stype, snow skin mooncakes and they turned out pretty good. Maggie and I both shared a big box so that we get to try out all the flavours they have. My favourite so far's the black sesame and durian. 

Speaking of mooncakes, a couple of weeks ago one of my classmates/good friend from school gave me a mooncake from Starbucks! Of course you can't buy mooncakes from Starbucks here, that would be bizarre hahah. Her boyfriend's parents came to visit and they're Malaysian and they brought mooncakes over. She had a few so she gave one to me. It feels really good to be surrounded by nice people :)

And since I'm talking about sweets, let me just talk about a couple (literally 2) of things I've made ever since I came to Melbourne. People who know me know I love to bake. Unfortunately, everything here is so expensive that I can't just decide to bake with a snap of my fingers. I can't afford to buy ingredients which I might only end up using once, or ingredients which are not even cheap to begin with.

First attempt was this Oreo stuffed chocolate chip cookies. Yes, a cookie within a cookie. Wait Oreo is not a cookie is it? More like a sandwich...

Anyway, I got the reccipe from here. Unfortunately, because I was *ahem* trying to be smart *ahem* the cookies ended being overly baked. The recipe asked to bake for 9-13 minutes. At the 15 minutes mark, the cookies were still pale and looked 'raw', so I left it on longer. Probably 20-25? I only took them out when they turned slightly brown. More appetising mah...

The cookies ended up being really, and I mean REALLY hard for cookies. Plus, they were humongous so they felt like rocks. They look like scones, only rock hard.

Which was utterly disappointing considering ingredients were not cheap (at least for me) :(

And in the pictures from the recipe, the icing in the Oreo along with the chocolate chips actually melted when baked! Mine didn't :( I think maybe if I ever try to bake this again, Imma use a higher temperature. 

The second thing I attempted was this Retro Coffee Cake which I first saw in Masterchef 2011. It was one of the dishes made by the winner of this year's competition. Recipe found here.

Everything was perfect... except for the cake.

Seriously this is so demotivating. 2 times baking and both didn't turn out well aka waste. of. money! :(

The recipe asked to bake in 2 x 20cm baking tins. Honestly, I didn't know what's that supposed to mean because I've never seen such instructions. It would have made a lot more sense if they say "bake in two 20cm baking tins", don't you think? So anyway,  I only used a 20cm baking tin to bake which means, my cake was super thick. Naturally, it wouldn't cook in the suggested time.

Instead of 30 minutes, I think I had to bake it for about an hour (or more) to finally have it perfectly cooked. By then, the edges around the cake was already rock hard and the insides a little dry. It's edible, but far from my expectation :(

The coffee butter cream was great. With espresso added, it wasn't too sweet. The cake... blehhhh.

I shall make the cake again since I still have some leftover coffee butter cream. 

---

Ok food stuff aside, yesterday one of my students twittered me that he scored distinction in his recent violin exam. Btw, yes I have 3 of my students following me on Twitter. I was so happy to hear that! And then it gets better. Another 2 of them scored distinction as well! I was soooooooo proud of them. The news just made my day, seriously.

Nothing is more rewarding for a teacher than to see their students enjoy what they learn and excel. Exams are not everything but it doesn't hurt to try and know your abilities. Clearly they've done themselves, their parents, their new teacher and their former teacher (meeeee) proud.

Congratulations Nikki, Michelle and Seng Zhao! 

Never thought I would say this if it was me a few years ago but I miss teaching :( I'm glad I did my part to guide them. Through the 6 years of teaching, I learnt so much more than I did in uni. They were experience no money could buy. Not saying I've never had students who failed under me, frankly, I have had 2. Which was also invaluable experience for me. Teaching became so much more than just earning money for a living, it became a part of me which I grew to love.

Now let me have my moment of glory... =D

 

Hoku hoku

Curling my hair with a straightener is fun! Aaand, it saves money cos I can curl and straighten with it, no need to buy a curling iron.

Hello! Anyone still reading? Haha.

Did anyone watch The Royal Wedding yesterday? I must say it was quite an entertainment. I didn't give a damn about it and found all the hoo haa quite ridiculous at first. I mean, it's just a wedding why all the excitement? In the TV there were like swarms of people (like ants, when viewed from the top) around the church, it looked almost like a celebration. Well, it is a celebration cos to them it is THE wedding, not a wedding. And I was joking and telling Wk wow if any terrorist wanted to attack the country, this would be the time to do it lol. Just saying.

Honestly, it was beautiful. Not just Princess William's (Kate Middleton) dress, the whole ceremony was, albeit very overwhelming. If it was me I would be so damn stressed and nervous to know that billions of people are watching me and my wedding. 

Something funny to share - someone in my twitter mentioned that while everyone's singing God Save The Queen, it was cute that the Queen just stood there while everyone's singing about her. It would have been funny if the Queen sang "God save me" LOL!

24 April 2011 - Japanese Night!

Easter was last weekend and Maggie and Kai Mun came over. We joined forces and cooked up a storm! Haha. We decided to call it "Japanese Night" and cooked Japanese dishes. Everyone had a role, or I should assigned to a dish to prepare!

Me - Hoku hoku croquette. Croquette is a type of deep friend ball rolled in breadcrumbs, and the ball is made of mashed potato and minced meat. Very interesting! My recipe is from this really funny Youtube cooking video, there he also explains the meaning of Hoku Hoku which is hillarious, I cannot stop laughing everytime I watch it! We also found the Bulldog Sauce in an asian grocery store! It's posing in the picture as well, can you spot it? :D

Maggie - Tempura and curry chicken. The tempura powder we both love is by Nissin. It's the only tempura powder I'll use! So good. The curry mix is actually a Japanese instant curry paste, so easy to make and tastes good too!

Kai Mun - Garlic fried rice. Very easy to make as well. Just fry it with lots of garlic, add some egg and spring onion and seasoning, kao tim.

Wei Kiat - Grilled beef-rolled enoki. This one tastes really good but very tricky to prepare, not forgetting it's also very costly. The marinade and sauce is premade but the rolling step is difficult cos the raw beef is really thin and fragile. Also, you need to have a really sharp knife to cut the cooked rolled beef into bite size  because it is almost impossible to bite the enoki off... if anyone gets what I mean. Go to Sushi Zanmai and order one and try it.

Wei Guan - He's the kitchen helper of the day!

It was quite a fun day. Esther I wish you were there :(

As for life, as usual, it sucks. Like I've mentioned, things aren't as simple as I thought they would be. I will strive, of course. Just like how I'm striving to play well on the violin. Wk and I created this little 'game', where I will have to achieve 24 hours of practice in a week to earn $50, if I don't I'll be fined $50. It's a little motivation to make me practice. So far, I've lost $50. And I've yet to earn back or earn additional $50 cos... I have my ways to not pay haha. But I know that's definitely not the whole point of this game. 24 hours honestly is not a lot considering I am free all the time. Gotta work harder!

Oh one more thing. Thank you to everyone who has been supporting and cheering me up whenever I feel like crap :) You guys are amazing!

What's for dinner?

At almost the end of yesterday I had the most excruciating backache ever. The kind where you just want to squat down, burry your face in between your knees and curl yourself like a ball. Or prawn, as how I usually like to say it.

I figured it's because the day before I was practising for about 6 hours or more and I was standing all the time. Not that I practised 6 hours continuously without breaks cos I can never do that, but for what I remember I was standing all the time. And then yesterday we went to DFO which required quite some walking. While inside DFO of course we walked again. When we were walking towards Ying Thai for dinner the pain was slowly building already and the cold weather only made the pain 10 times worse.

Lesson learnt. Don't ever practise for such long hours without sitting down eventhough I wasn't tired. It'll only strain my back and I'll have to pay for it later.

Thankfully I had someone to give me free back massage ♡ Not pro but better than nothing! :)

I feel a little 'crippled' without having a camera around :( Thought of purchasing a charger from Sony out of desperation but it's AUD 89 dammit so expensive. Now I'll have to ask someone to send it to me and I guess the worst part of it is waiting haihh. Meanwhile, I'll have to abuse Wk's iPhone since my phone's camera sucks.

Here are pictures of some of the meals I cooked. I don't claim to be or in anyway think I'm a good cook but I just find them picture worthy. So that someday in the future I can read and look back at old posts and say "Wow I actually cooked that crap!" Lol. Joking.

This was actually really simple to do. Wk found the lamb shank recipe online and all I had to do was to follow the recipe. Wk did the mash which was really creamy and buttery mmm... There's no specific recipe to it. Just cook some potatoes, mash it, add butter, salt, pepper and milk until you like the taste. I think he added some rosemary to it... which he adds to most things he cooks wtf I don't know why.

It was one of the first few meals we cooked so at that time, we didn't have a dining table so we had to sit around these boxes to eat hahahah!

My favourite thing to cook is my own version of cheese omelette! Super easy as well. And the meatballs are actually my 2nd time making them. They didn't taste as good at first but after keeping them in the fridge for a few days and reheating them, they somehow tasted a lot better! Which is weird.

Salmons sold here are really fresh.

This was our brunch one day. Ok I just noticed my 'pancakes' has a typo haha. The pancake mix we got is from The Pancake Parlour which some of you by now may already know that it's one of my favouritest place to eat at lol. The mix is really easy to use and tastes really good as well!

Instead of Marmite, we have something called Vegemite over here which I assume is the exact same thing. I heard Australians eat Vegemite with bread for breakfast. Wtf I can't imagine the taste but I'm curious, I might try it one day. 

We made Bah Kut Teh one Friday night and invited Maggie and Kai Mun over for dinner. It was pretty good but we forgot to add fu zhuk and tau pok. And fish maw. and abalone wtf I'm joking. I made a REALLY huge pot of the soup cos I used 2 packets of the herbs and it asked for 3 litres of water for each. Lol. In the end we kept the extra soup in the fridge but after 2 days it turned into this brownish black jelly consistency hahaah. I know technically it still can be consumed by just reheating but blehhhh. We threw it away already.

Ok that's all the pictures I have so far. Need to grab some stuff out from the freezer for dinner tonight. Byeee.

Snow in a tumbler

Thank goodness for Twitter or I'll never get to buy a Starbucks tumbler for so much lesser than if I were to get it here! 

One of my violin students was tweeting about the Starbucks tumbler being cheaper in Macau and I asked her about it. Technically it is cheap only if you purchase a drink but it's still a good deal! I can't remember how much they cost over here... prolly RM 40? RM 45? Over there it's only RM 21 after converting! They had a catalogue so she sent me pictures of it so that I could choose which one I wanted. Since it was around Christmas they have quite a number of limited edition (I think), Christmas-y designs which I thought were really cute! And I think some of it weren't even available in Malaysia.

I didn't expect much when I chose this cos the pictures didn't look that promising but when I saw it in person I loved it instantly! It is everything I've wanted in a Starbucks tumbler. I quite like the one my sister's having but that's the ONLY one I like compared to all the other tumblers over here. I've been holding back and not purchase it only because it IS very expensive for just a tumbler. This one I'm having right now is just perfect :)

Thank you Nikki!

My favourite part of the design is the little holographic dots all over the bottle, which resembles glistening snow!

 And random doodlings of cute desserts. 

Also, I've finally gotten enough stamps to redeem the 2011 planner! I was left with about 7 stamps and it was 2 weeks to the deadline (15 Jan) and I was thinking oh crap how can I drink 7 Starbucks drinks in 2 weeks. Then one day I was on the way to uni and I casually asked Cat on the phone to ask around if anybody in uni wanna get some Starbucks and then she told me to get 5 for the orchestra assistants! Wheeeeeeeeee :D

Honestly, I'm a little bit disappointed. The exterior looks a lot better and is definitely of better quality but function wise, I still prefer last year's. I'll elaborate more on this another day.

After stopping violin lessons for about 3-4 months, I've finally resumed to learning again yesterday. Enjoyed it very much, feel all motivated once again! :) 

The next few months are going to be rocky due to questions nobody can answer for now. Hopefully everything will go smooth sailing.

OMG

Ok I should not have complained about my parents not bringing me with them on their mini Europe trip. My mom got me a huge souvenir tee hee XD

No this is not the BIG one obviously but I just thought I'd share as it is one of the souvenirs they got me. Swarovski crystals from Austria for each of my siblings and I.

Whoa!

=)

I refuse to show a picture of the bag because 1. Technically I didn't pay for it so I shouldn't be proud., but that doesn't mean I'm not happy ok only stupid people would not be lol. 2. If you're curious, take a guess by looking at the handle - I'm sure it's pretty easy if you're familiar with the brand, or if you've always been looking at the bags online and daydream of the day you'll buy one aka like me hahaahh.

There's also a CD of a local Hungarian violinist's recording bought from Budapest woo woo woo I'm listening to it right now actually it's brilliant! He's playing his improvised version of Monti's Czardas it's craaaaazy. Oh well Czardas IS a type of Hungarian dance so it's no surprise that he plays well.

Anyway. No pictures cos I'm lazy haha. My mom's luggage was lost at first but they found it already and it came home today. The CD and the bag's dust  bag were in the lost luggage too so thank goodness it's safe now.

Ok random note,

Recently bought this nail polish and I was and am still sooooooo intrigued by the colour!

BRB

Ok today, I won't blog about anything. 

(Ya right... wtf am I doing now)

My violin lesson is in a few hours time so I need to really practice now otherwise Imma die. Not that he(teacher) will kill me but the fact that he doesn't say anything, is even more scary. Sometimes, silence is the best teacher.

I'm tagged by the lovely Manda! Yay! I love doing tags. Er... I don't mean lame ones like what did you do 5 minutes ago who was the last person you called what was the last drink you had etc. It's a girly, What's In Your Bag tag. Actually I've done it before but oh well, girls change their minds so often. So do their bags and what's inside! Will do it maybe tonight or tomorrow.

Ciao.

Bambambam

Ok. I might need to cancel the trip to Singapore to watch Joshua Bell perform in the Esplanade. Not that I seriously cannot afford to but if I go, I might be suffocating on the rest of the days in June. Also might need to save up for violin ATCL exam's registration for this year if I'm taking, which needs at least 1k there FML. Why can't I be born with a silver spoon in my mouth? Haih. T_T

My stupid violin case of almost 5 years now, is finally acting up on me. Well, not completely damaged or anything but it's starting to look bad and work (slightly?) not so properly anymore.

Look how pathetic the zippers are.

Anyhow, I've been thinking of getting a new case for some time already but I don't wanna just get "a" violin case. I want Bam... like this, or this. 

 

Sigh money money money.

Currently...

Currently reading:

1. Eat, Pray, Love - Elizabeth Gilbert

2. The White Tiger - Aravind Adiga

Currently on a ______ obsession:

1. Music Books. I'm looking for that Carl Flesh Scales book and Mozart's Violin Concerto No. 3. I think I am now in love with Rachmaninof's Vocalise and all the Paganini's Etudes and Caprices for Violin. I know I can't play many of those yet, but it's good to keep books as references and for future use. For music books, I  never support photocopies. For myself I mean. I only photocopy and use them when I know I'll be using them a lot and I don't want to ruin the original book.

2. That buy 1 get 2nd 50% off promotion at Popular Bookstore. I just bought 2 books the other day from that promo (The White Tiger by Aravind Adiga and Kafka On The Shore by Haruki Murakami), thinking of getting another 2... maybe that two books by Khaled Hosseini.

Currently feeling happy cos:

1. My Nars Sheer Glow Foundation just arrived from the US yesterday! I bought it (Wk paid for it HAHAHHA) more than 2 weeks ago and was beginning to be worried until yesterday.

2. I might take the Trinity ATCL Violin exam this year. Happiness didn't come from myself deciding to take it, but someone good in the violin telling me I can take it given that I work hard enough for it. Now it's just a matter of finding out when is the registration date closing.

Currently annoyed by:

That stupid book stockist. Everytime I asked them to help me get some books which were not available in the store, it never happened. What's annoying is not when they couldn't find it, but when they asked me to leave my contact number and promised they'll call and they never did. If they're not planning to look for it for me, then don't promise! At least I won't be waiting for their call like an idiot. Despite all that, I still buy from them. Just because I'm too lazy to go all the way to KL to find. Grrrr.

Currently planning to go:

1. Pangkor and Ipoh this end of May with Cat and Jian.

2. Singapore this middle of June to watch Joshua Bell's concert!

Ok gotta go. Thanks for reading all you lovely readers! :)

x

Eev

SOS

Out of time out of time!!!

No thanks to working full time right now. I come home exhausted everynight. Where do I even find time to practice!

FTS.

Crap.

I have a lot to work on but I totally understand how much I NEED. But the situation is not helping at all.

(Abrubt ending without a bye cos need to go practice right away lol)

Working

So I went to daddy's shop today to work. I get to bring my laptop over and there's a broadband modem there so I also get to online, which is absolutely fantastic. Wk says "anywhere with internet is your home" wtf. Which is actually true lah hahahah. 

My dad also told me that I can practice there if I want to cos most of the time, there's really nothing much to do but to sit and smack flies. Which is also great since I've been complaining that working there is taking all my time I need to practice but the problem is; I still don't have the guts to whip out my violin and start playing there. There isn't any closed room that I can go into and practice, except the toilet wtf. I think it's so freaking weird to just play violin in an art gallery. No?

I checked Air Asia just now and zomfg, the flight ticket to Melbourne is so freaking cheap! For 2 weeks around Aug-Sept, I found tickets as low as RM900++! 

I really want to but I can't go T_____T

Cos I'll be going again this December for a month. I just got back like 2 days ago from a 2 weeks trip. So if I go again this Aug-Sept, that makes 3 times a year! As much as I want to, I don't think my parents will be happy with it eventhough they're not paying for it. I figured that I should really plan ahead and save the money instead for something else and focus more on my audition. Yes, I'm STILL going to apply to study at Melbourne. 

But ohmigoshhhh it freaking breaks my heart to see how cheap the tickets are and I can't do a thing about it T____T

This is why I graduated with a degree but I'm still not working.

I'm writing this because it's getting very frustrating everytime people come up to me and talk about job related stuffs just because I've graduated with a degree and also partly because my application for master studies got rejected. And most people think upon graduating one should be working full time already, earning a steady income, have a certain amount in your savings, and maybe paying installments for car, house, insurance and whatnot. What's frustrating is how they can never EVER ever understand my dilemma and how I'm stuck in a situation where things are not going the typical way.

If you've never learned any kind of musical instrument, or if you've learned but have never been passionate about learning a musical instrument, you'll never know that learning to play an instrument is a never ending process. A lot of people (especially parents and people who don't learn to play anything) think that music stops at the very commonly mentioned GRADE 8.

So that makes them think that obtaining a Grade 8 certificate from whatever exam board means one has completed learning music and there's nothing there to be learned anymore - as though you've a language course or something. That I can totally understand cos if you're not that passionate about music or you've never properly learned music, you won't even know that there are still 3 more Diploma Certificates to go. But there are also people who think that music stops after that 3rd Diploma. And there are even people who think that you stop learning after you've gotten a music degree.

Oh my god. You know, once and for all, I think everyone should know by now that music is a never ending process! In fact, EDUCATION and LEARNING is a never ending process! Having a music degree doesn't mean there's nothing else to be learned anymore! I'm not talking about going up to masters, or doctorate and stuffs. I'm talking about technical and practical stuffs, not theories and researches. About learning to play the instrument from a teacher.

Since graduation, I now only teach for 2 days in a week, not even 2 full days. And a lot of people are kind of making a big fuss about it - those who would NEVER understand that is. And now, I want to FREAKING MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND.

I started to play the violin only when I was 16, and prior to that, I've been learning piano since I was 7. I dunno about others but to me, it was a very late start. Some people came to me and told me "oh you started so late and you're so good already you must be really talented". The truth is, no. I progressed quickly because I have a strong piano and musical theory background. It's easy for me only because I already have the basics in my finger muscles and my brains. If there are people out there who are good even when they started late and they didn't have any sort of basics prior to that, those you can call them talented, but not me.

I realised how much I like playing the violin more than piano after about 2-3 years learning it, which was the reason why I chose it over piano as my first study instrument when I did my degree. 

I learned under a very good Norwegian teacher, but he left after teaching me for about a year. After that, I was under some amature teacher. I said amature because he wasn't bad, but just not a good one. Don't get me wrong, I've never considered myself as a good teacher either. I'm still learning but I do not teach half-heartedly unless the students themselve are learning half-heartedly. I wouldn't even bother screaming at students if I didn't really care about their learning progress. 

Anyway, I learned under that amature teacher for about a year or so before I went to Form 6 and stopped. I wanted to continue learning. I did, off and on cos I was already working part time and I was paying the fees myself so at times when I didn't have enough money,  I had to stop.

My learning progress can be considered a mess cos I didn't learn, play or practice constantly all because of studies and work and obviously, money. I didn't want to ask money from my parents for reasons I do not have to mention here.

When I did my degree in UM, I admit I slacked a lot and I never learn to prioritize. I was working a lot more, more than I should be cos I needed the money especially that 2 years I stayed out. I had to support my room's rent, phone bills, food and miscellaneous things myself. My dad only gave me enough to cover petrol. Even the furnitures in my room was paid with my own money.  With classes and work filling up my time, I didn't have enough time to practice.

This may all seem like some bunch of nicely made up excuses, but they happened. The only mistake I admit making is I didn't know how to prioritize earlier when I should be - I should have not worked so much and practice more when I still had the time to, and because of that now I'm compensating for it.

The reason I don't want to occupy all my time to work, is because I need them to practice.

FYI, profesional musicians practice at least 8 HOURS EVERY SINGLE DAY. And I said at least. If I were to work, I'll get home feeling tired and lazy already. Where do I even get that kind of time and energy to practice? 

If I had a choice I would have stopped working altogether, that gives me more time. The only reason I'm still working is because I need the money to pay for my lesson fees. My lesson costs RM 120 PER LESSON of only an hour, if you should know. It probably wouldn't be a problem to some people but to people like me who has to to work to pay it off, it is. 

What if I stopped learning and just teach full time now? I'll definitely be earning a lot more, probably enough to open a centre of my own but that's probably the only thing I can do for the rest of my life. AND THAT'S NOT WHAT I WANT TO DO FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. 

I'm not someone who's into business. I can't manage anything to save a life. And I don't want to teach and take only 60% commision all my life. 

I want to be on the stage playing - whether it's with people in an orchestra, or solo. I want to be really good in what I do. I don't want to be one of those people who goes by the saying "Those who can't do, teach." . I REALLY DON'T WANT TO BE LIKE THAT. I want to be able to teach, AND perform. I want to be the one who takes RM 120 per lesson of an hour.

There you have it, my goal. And to achieve that, first I need to buck up on my technicalities and skills. And to achieve that, I need A WHOE LOT OF TIME to practice. And to achieve that, I obviously cannot work that much. The amount of money I earn from work is enough to cover my lesson fees. And because of that, how can anyone expect me to have a certain amount of savings, pay for a car, house or insurance, or even give to my parents?

I seriously hope my parents and the rest of the people who think I'm a bummer reads this and understand my situation. Then again, they probably wouldn't cos sometimes people are just too stubborn and money-minded. I mean, I am money-minded myself, this is a material world who are we kidding? But I do have my own passion and I don't want to live a boring and uninteresting, mediocre life later. I want to live my life doing something I'm passionate about even if it means I cannot earn much.

Project 365, A Package & Plans

There'll be a breast cancer charity concert on this Saturday in UM. Rehearsals are everyday till late and by the time I get home I'm usually quite exhausted so the next day I'll be sleeping through the morning before leaving to uni for rehearsals. That explains the absence. I should be sleeping now but I decided to update a little.

My Project 365 has finally ended! It feels so weird when I looked at the picture I took exactly a year ago. Food from Wong Kok, I still remember clearly I was with Cat, and it was our final semester and we were very frequently eating together in SS2. Aah, nostalgia. I can't believe I have actually graduated for half a year and I'm jobless lol. I still teach but I don't have any full time job in hand. Which is a good (lots of time to practice) and bad (no money) thing apparently. Ok anyway, pictures next time.

Today I received a package from a friend I made in Youtube. I initially only expected a few things from her (some stuffs I bought from her and some stuffs she decided to give to me cos she has extra) but when I opened the packages up I was in awe cos she sent me so many things! Seriously, I can't believe there still are people as kind as her out there... T___T *touched. For you nosy people who are wondering, she sent me makeup products lah.

Last update, a pretty exciting one! =D It's ALMOST confirmed that I'll be going to Melbourne this December with Wk's family. I say almost cos the date's decided, everyone said ok, what's left is of course purchasing flight tickets. We're planning to visit Sydney again (for Wk and I) since his parents haven't been there. As for mid-year, I'll most probably go too but a shorter trip since I'll be going again in December. 

Actually now that I think about it again, getting rejected isn't as bad as I had initially put it. At least, I still am blessed with people who can sponsor me to go there LOL! And I figure I'll use this 1 year to think properly about my future - whether choosing to study Masters is even a necessity at all, or should I just stay here and keep learning and improve my skills and techniques. I'll be able to go anyhow, it's just a matter of sooner or later.

Economical & Just Nice VS Expensive & Perfect

Ok. It's finally decided.

My very kind lecturer agreed to let me use his sound recording devices/softwares so I'm saving money on recording my audition. If any of you have been following my twitter, I mentioned,

"should i choose something 'economical & just nice' or something 'expensive & perfect'?"

I was actually talking about recording my audition. I have been really worried and stressed out with deciding the right way to record my audition. Initially, I thought of using the regular sound recorder and go to one of the practice studios in uni and get it done. Then I realised that the sound quality may not be the best. In fact, it may even turn out to be bad. Then I consulted one of the music major in Uni of Melbounre who happens to found my blog and know my situation, and who very kindly dropped me a message too. She told me it's best to record it in a recording studio. Which at first, seemed like a good option but not until I realised I actually need a recording studio which has a piano.

Being an instrumentalist is not something everyone should be envious of. Do you know how much I had to spend just for this audition? I had to attend violin lessons. Approximately RM 100-120 per lesson. I had to rehearse with my accompanist. RM 100 per hour of rehearsal. And renting a recording studio, I'm not sure of the rates but I heard it can be from RM 100 - 500 (or more?) per hour depending on which studio I go to. And it gets more expensive when I'm using a studio which provides a piano. I need not just "a piano". I actually need "a grand piano", or anything that's equivalent to decent. That again marks up the price.

Sorry I digressed. So, a few days ago I went back to uni to just catch up with Cat and a lecturer and I told him about my situation and he suggested I do it in uni cos there's a recording studio in uni, and it's more 'economical' lol. I didn't think of uni at first even when I knew there is a recording studio with sufficient recording devices/softwares cos the studio is a very small one and there isn't any proper piano in it. The only way to do the recording in uni, is to shift all the devices to one of the studios which has a decent grand piano. And the good news is, he agreed to do so.

=)

So I've chosen the 'economical and just nice' option simply because I think it'll most likely be the same anyway just that I'm paying so much more for a more established and well-facilitated studio. The sound quality probably will be better but seriously, this is only an audition. It's not like I'm producing an album or anything like that.

The schedule is I'll be at uni for the whole day to record this and if all goes well, I'll be applying on Thursday!

Oh before I go, just wanna say I've watched New Moon. Hop on to Esther's blog to read about what I think cos we both share the same thoughts on it. Except that I'm with Team Jacob lol!

Vlog "Audition & Pink Pringles"

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A Short Update

1. I didn't get anything from the Balm. My plan was to go there on Thursday but on Wednesday, I thought I wanted to just drop by MAC @ Sunway Pyramid to pick up a few stuffs since I had an hour before work starts. I ended up buying a whole crapload from MAC so... I could have bought the things I wanted from the Balm but I figured there's no point getting too many similar things. In a shorter phrase, I'm broke. Wtf. I was even late for work HAHAHA.

2. That ranty post down there, well. That guy finally replied and I'll be seeing him tomorrow. But I'm a little nervous now cos my pieces aren't really ready yet T___T

3. I'm left with about 100 pages of The Time Traveler's Wife and then I can go watch the movie! Who wants to go with me? Anyone? No one? Fine, I can go alone.

5. If I'm not updating very often, it means I'm busy preparing my audition tape. But oh who am I kidding. The last time I said this, look what's happening now! But oh please oh please, just let me focus T____T

4. Lastly, entertain yourself =)

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My Wish

I'm in a lovey dovey mood now so if you can't stand stuffs like that, don't bother reading.

I was reading The Time Traveler's Wife and came upon this page which talks about how much Clare wants to chop her hair off but can't because Henry loves it and then she says she will miss it but it's just so much effort. It felt so familiar reading all that because, for the longest time I have always wanted to cut my hair short (when my hair was super duper long) and when I say short, I mean super short. Has anyone ever noticed how long my hair used to be?


Crap would you look at that? It reached my hips. My freakin' hips.

And honestly, I do miss it T_T

Not that my hair's super short now. It's heavily layered and the length still remained about the same but it doesn't look as long as it was, like in that picture anymore just because it's much thinner now. The reason I kept the length is because, like Clare, I know I will definitely miss it and also, Wk loves my long hair (he tells me that, I didn't assume this myself ok) and I know he'll definitely be upset if I cut it short.

Anyway, I must say, having it layered has been the best thing I could do for my hair cos all my split ends are now gone, it's more manageable, it doesn't tangle as much, it's easier to comb and the best part is I still get to keep the length eventhough it might not look as long as before :)

Ok I know, that's like totally random. I just thought I would share that small part of that novel here cos I can relate to it so much. That book has been ok. I won't say it's as interesting as Life of Pi but I do enjoy reading it. It's so freakin' thick lah 500 pages wtf. Probably need another month or two to finish it cos I only do about 8-10 pages a day.

Ok that aside, I have been missing Wk so damn freakin' much these few days. We skype/msn /webcam almost every single day. We sometimes wake each other up. And the best part is, we motivate each other to do what we're supposed to do - I'm supposed to practice, he's supposed to work on his design. And I must say, having him around is sooooo much better cos otherwise, I won't even bother to take my violin out!

Everytime I look at him in my laptop's screen, I think of the day we're going to live together, in OUR apartment, OUR room, OUR kitchen, OUR bed, OUR computer (haha next time about this), OUR place. And it just motivates me to want to work hard and just get freakin' get accepted by the university.

The next time I go to Melbourne, I'm expecting to say... "OUR" apartment instead of "HIS" apartment, or "HIS" bed. The next time I we wish each other "good morning nigga" (inside joke), I want to be able to laugh right in front of him and not just typing "ha ha ha" and punch 'Enter' on the keyboard. And the next time I expect all these, is next year.

The more I think about all these, the more I want to practice, and the more I think about all these, the more I'm afraid of rejection. It's stressing me out seriously.

This is not just a diploma or a degree. It's a master studies. It's not something you can apply by sending in a bunch of papers and forms and whatnot. I sometimes wonder if I'm actually fit, or good enough to apply. A lot of people tell me I can do it and I can get in and all that. I know everyone's being nice but whether they really think I am good enough, I don't know. What I know is I want to just do my best, and apply and hope for the best.

But I constantly think about a lot of 'what if's. What if I get rejected?

I cannot take rejection. At all. Not at this stage now. He has given up the contract and hasn't even found a new accomodation, all because he's expecting me. How can I even deal with a rejection when I'm thrown with all these expectations?

Another reason to not being able to handle rejection is that I seriously cannot stand this LDR any longer anymore.

I just want to stay beside him and have someone to touch my hair. I just want to stay beside him and have someone to keep me warm. I just want to stay beside him and have someone to tell me how much he loves me everyday, right to my face and not through the computer or phones. I'm just someone who's like many others out there, who needs her dose of affection everyday. I hope it's not too much to ask for.

Life of Pi - Yann Martel

Anyone noticed my "Currently Reading" column has one book taken off?

Bet no one did, cos I just only took it off HAHA. Ok not funny.

Anyway, yes I've finished Life of Pi finally! Aileen are you reading this? Haha. And I must tell you, IT IS SUCH A FREAKIN' GOOD BOOK!!!

Ohmigosh I can't describe how moved and... amazed I was with it. I simply cannot find the right word to describe how I feel about it. It's a mixture of inspired, moved, awed and all that. And at the beginning I was complaining so much about how boring it was. Seriously the first half (or maybe a third) was so freakin' boring I almost wanted to give up and start on other books. I was like what the hell, why the hell this book is a bestseller and why the hell it's a winning book for some dunno what booker prize? But oh well, everynight before I sleep I thought "Ok let's just give this another try" for a few nights and finally, it got interesting somewhere in the middle - when the ship sank.

I'm not going to start reviewing this book besides telling you readers that it's 'good' cos I suck at reviewing and my review will totally do no justice to how great and well-written this book is. I tried telling the story to Wk earlier in the afternoon and all he did was, "I don't see the point..." and "Huh, like that also can ah?" or "Hrm... why must he do that?"........zzzzz........

I was so excited that I wanted to excite him as well but he totally didn't get the whole point of the story. That proves how bad I am with words.
...

Either that, or he sucks. HAHAHHA.

So anyway, I'm both happy and sad that I've finished a book. Happy cos yay can go on to another book. Sad cos... I don't know if it's just me or what, but whenever I finish something be it books or a soap or a tv show series, I always get this 'empty' feeling after that. It's like... ok I'm done so what's next? And somehow I won't be as interested in other books/tv shows anymore given that the book/show that I previously read/watched, was really good. But yeah, I'm continuing on the other 2 books now.

I am totally anticipating for the movie! I heard it's directed by Ang Lee. It better be good! Well, seeing that it's Ang Lee, I'm putting high expectation on it.

Ok gotta go practice now. Oh yah good news good news!!! I totally saved RM500 cos I managed to get my university's letter to prove that the language of instruction was in English so now I can be exempted from IELTS!!! Ok what's bothering me now is that freakin' audition recording haih.

Haircut again!

Ok so it's Raya today. But I've got to work in the afternoon FML.

Well, I could have cancelled both classes cos they're actually replacements for the lessons when I go to Melbourne and if I don't do it today, they'll all pile up and I'll have a hard time arranging later. So, yeah.

I'm leaving on Tuesday btw =) Gosh how time flies! The wait has not felt like forever because I most of the time just forget the fact that I'm going there again haha! Probably because I bought the tickets like 4 months ago and omg it has been 3 months since I came back! Time sure flies. I'll only be there for 2 weeks but I guess 2 weeks is better than nothing. It's spring over there now so tulip farm here I come!

And I don't know if anyone agrees with me but don't you find that the clock ticks especially faster when you're procrastinating, or you're just doing something unproductive when you SHOULD be doing something else?

=( Not good. I hope I can get a good violin teacher in Melbourne to give me some master classes when I"m there.

Anyway, on another note, I cut my hair again! I couldn't stand how it's puffy on the side (my ears) and STILL flat at the top! Cos the last time I got my haircut the hairstylist wouldn't give me more layers. It was long in the inner layers, but at the outer layer it was like bob-short and that's really long if you wanna have volume! And after a while the sides just puffed up. I was ok with it for about a week or two and then I got really fed up that the volume on my hair just couldn't stay even after having hair products on. I went to Kimarie again but this time at the Taipan branch and told the hairstylist what I wanted and I'm glad that finally there is one hairstylist who actually listens his customer.

He made the sides A LOT thinner now and the crown of my hair super layered. I have hair as short as like only 3 inches at the crown of my head! He did a sucky job in styling for me though, just some hair spray but its okay because I am now pretty sure that my volume will stay better already.

Ok gotta get ready for work now.

I wish everyone a happy Raya.

Vlog "Tag: 6 Things I Can't Live Without"

Found this while I was randomly looking around in YouTube.

Click play, turn off the volume, go elsewhere and hang around, come back in about 10 minutes and click replay. Ok? =)

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Finger Nails

I really wanna blog (nothing interesting la, just some usual updates) but I really gotta practise now cos tomorrow I have class at 8am and I haven't been practising for the past 2 weeks.

T_______T

Ok. Lemme just go cut my nails first. If you didn't know, when my nails are long, it means I haven't been practising. Violin/piano players cannot keep their nails cos it gets in the way during performance/practice. You'll hear "click clack click clack" when a piano player with long nails plays the piano. Violin players with long nails (left hand specifically) can never press the strings down because the long nails will reach the fingerboard before the fingers do and nails cannot bend so in other words, they can't even press the strings! Long nails on the right hand which holds the bow too will affect the bow hold and also the whole performance/practice.

OKAYYYYYY gtg.